Mary Robinette Kowal - The Ten Chickiest Fantasy Flicks


When it comes to genre stereotypes, fantasy is divided into two diametrically opposed categories: One is targeted at 14-year old boys and depicts white men dominating helpless females (and their heaving bosoms) with phallic weaponry. The other is more girl friendly, dominated by fairies, lace and unicorns. And since I've never seen a stereotype I haven't wanted to poke at, let's take a look at the latter. You want girly? These fantasy chick flicks are calculated to have men running away screaming.

7. If Only (2004)
What a weeper this one is. Like Sliding Doors, it shows you two ways a life can go -- though not in parallel. It plays into the whole depressing idea that your love will only really understand you after you're dead. So halfway through the movie Samantha (Jennifer Love Hewitt) gets hit by a car. With a chance to live the day over again, her boyfriend, Ian Wyndham (Paul Nicholls) realizes what a treasure he has and ends up dying in her place. I'm sorry. Do we really need to romanticize this notion?

6. Penelope (2006)
This one is like Beauty and the Beast in reverse... or Shrek in forward. One of those "six of one" scenarios. What I like about it is that it's very focused on accepting people they way they are. This is important, because Penelope (Christina Ricci) has a pig's snout. What keeps the movie from the Top Five is that to get a happy ending it romanticizes class distinctions, since Penelope can only break the curse if "one of her kind" accepts her. Boo.

5. Ella Enchanted (2004)
Let me sum this one up for you: OMG! A Prince! OMG! I don't have a thing to wear! OK, there's a tiny bit more to it than that, but it's about as fraught with teenage angst as you can get and still maintain some fantasy cred (and nab the fifth spot). There's a sweet coming of age story in here, and Ella (Anne Hathaway) makes a strong and appealing female lead. And yes, it has the requisite happy ending that chicks flicks require.

4. Enchanted (2007)
I'll admit it: This one made me cry in the chickiest, flickiest way imaginable. I mean, you've got a princess in modern day New York who sways a confirmed cynic into believing in romance. Everyone gets married with happy endings galore. And singing rodents! And Ooh! There's fashion in this one, too: Pretty dresses, a trip to the salon and a ball! What more could a girl possibly want? Keep reading and you'll find out.

3 .City of Angels (1998)
Your boyfriend is a fallen angel. If the premise alone isn't enough to drive all the men out of the room, check out this sappy dialogue: "I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss of her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it." Sniff. Hand me a hanky. You can just see all the chicks in the audience looking woefully at their dates and wondering why they can't find true romance like that. At least, they would if their dates were still around.

2. The Lake House (2006)
The biggest component of a fantasy chick flick is that something must prevent perfect lovers from being together. In this case, it's a two year gap in time. This leaves Kate (Sandra Bullock) free to pine for her love without ever realizing that he's Keanu Reeves. You've also got the wildly improbable happy ending that chick flicks crave: She saves him from CERTAIN DEATH, and then manages to bridge the gap in time. Then Kate lives happily ever after. With Keanu... OK, so it's almost a happy ending. What you really need is...

1. Kate and Leopold (2001)
So Kate (Meg Ryan) is this hot career woman, you know, and then, oh my God, she meets this hot guy Leopold, Duke of Albany (Hugh Jackman) who is totally hot and a time traveller. And did I mention hot? And he's like, you know, from 1876 so he's all like, really good with words and chivalry and stuff. He opens doors for her. If you want a fantasy that lets you have your career and your beefcake too, this is the number one flick for you.
Mary Robinette Kowal is the winner of the 2008 John W. Campbell Award for Best New Writer and a professional puppeteer. Her first novel Shades of Milk and Honey is being published by Tor in 2010.










With regards to Kate & Leopold, Liev Shrieber is also the best ex-boyfriend ever. EVER.
Mary, you may want to re-clarify City of Angels. Your boyfriend is an angel who fell because he chose you over being an angel. That has to bump the chickiness factor up to at least #2.
I like a fair number of these. Enchanted is fun (love "Happy Working Song"), Sliding Doors, and I can't hate on Legend. Probably because of the goblins (it sure isn't for Tom Cruise or Mia Sara).
No love for Ever After? It's all romantic and gooey in parts, but still has an actual functional female.
Personally, I thought that Tim Curry was the best attraction in Legend. That probably says something about me.
I do love Ever After, but is it fantasy? I think it's just bad history with improbable glitter.
Hey Joe, while her acting was nothing to fawn over, Mia Sara's black wedding dress is a part of the film I simply can't hate on. But Alice Playton's Blix and Tim Curry's Darkness are the real show stealers for me.
I've never been able to watch more than a few minutes of City of Angels. I think its because I adore Wim Wenders' Wings of Desire too much to stand it being simply turned into a romance.
I'm with the Ever After voters. A Cinderella who kicks ass and saves the Prince not once, but several times? Gotta have it on the list.
Enchanted was also great- having mice and cockroaches clean the place- great touch!
With a wife and two daughters, I've seen many of these. (That's my explanation, and I'm sticking to it!)
I'll admit that I liked Ella Enchanted and Splash.
With the "time traveling romance" theme, where might _Somewhere In Time_ rank on this list? Superman (well, Christopher Reeve) travels through time for love, based on novel by ... Richard Matheson!
- yeff
Being a guy, I will say I like Splash. I think it's the combo of Hanks and Candy help make it a little more enjoyable for a guy. Of course, I was a teenager when it came out, and Daryl Hannah was in it. Need I say more?
But, City of Angels? Yes, that is pretty much the definition of chick flick. Nothing wrong with that at all, since that's what they were shooting for.
These are all goof choices.