Brendan Fraser’s Frustrated Male Fantasies


Brendan Fraser loves to act out male fantasies: he gets to play Tarzan in George of the Jungle and a Colombian drug lord in Bedazzled. Those roles have won him his fair share of male fans, while his cuteness has earned him the adoration of girls. What’s surprising is how often these fantasies get derailed. Consider these five failed attempts at living the dream.

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Inkheart (2009)
What man wouldn’t love the ability to make money rain down from the sky? Sadly, Fraser botches his lucrative opportunity by “reading” his wife into a magic book and thereby losing her for twelve years, before his daughter comes in to save the day. (Talk about emasculating.) Getting rich quick? He did that. Protecting his mate through thick and thin? Not so much.

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Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008)
Thanks to Jules Verne’s science-fiction classic, Fraser gets the adventure of a lifetime (and a sharp hottie as his sidekick-assistant to boot). Yet even as he discovers a land hitherto unknown to man, he’s never bright enough to realize that the book he’s been consulting throughout could’ve protected him from a number of mishaps and scary creatures.

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Monkeybone (2001)
Fraser gets a chance here to be the ultimate goof: He jumps into a self-made cartoon world overflowing with hot chicks and fart jokes. The problem? This alternate reality can only be accessed by way of a coma. To make matters worse, his animated alter ego begins to take over his human body. As cartoonist and cartoon, Fraser’s got the ability to manipulate the world around him, but all he gets is played.

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Bedazzled (2000)
Fraser is granted seven wishes by the Devil. Power, wealth, fame, etc. What red-blooded American male doesn’t want these things? But every wish fulfillment comes with a twist: Fraser’s Colombian drug lord is a cuckold, and his “most sensitive man in the world” can’t get through a sunset without weeping.

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George of the Jungle (1997
Fraser gets to run around in a loincloth and shirk the normal 9-to-5 concerns that plague the rest of us. That is, until the real world gives him a nasty wake-up call (though he ultimately gets the girl).

It’s worth noting that Fraser’s fantasies haven’t always fallen flat. In Encino Man (1992) — his breakout film — he escapes becoming a dinosaur’s prehistoric lunch by getting frozen in a block of ice and ends up thawed out and attending a contemporary high school. He’s the most popular kid on campus.

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