Move foreward. This never happened!

"Deny deny deny."

And, also what kathiemarie said....excellent!

"Limit your exposure."
Oops, too late!

if you believe it, it's not a lie - Oh wait, that's George Castanza

Don't date porn stars?

"Disappear for weeks at a time" and "lie to everything about everybody" as per Don Draper's Guide to Women (from SNL) hehe

Now, let's see if Don Draper can foresee the future w/all this modern technology; he would say:

Tiger, you need to change your stripes, firstly by not using your cell phones in connection w/your lady friends. Secondly, divorce stay single.

Hi everyone!

I miss Mad Men!! And, my fellow Maddicts!

This is a great thread...

My guess is Don would say: "Were we separated at birth?"

Hi ther 60'schild! I know what you mean I miss all you Maddicts too! Hey everybody!

I think Don would say what's the difference between Tiger and Santa Claus? Answer: Santa only has 3 ho, ho, ho's. :-( Sorry I just heard that baaaad joke today..... my apologies...

For Tiger - too late to deny. Too many allegations out there to deflect. Take some time off to get yourself accustomed to the fact that as long as you are a public figure, little that you do will be private. Now that these indiscretions are out there, your public persona is forever changed. Just play your best, be the best father you can be and move on. The difference between Tiger and Don is that Don's personal problems are just that. The world doesn't care what Don has or hasn't done. Just Betty and the kids, really. Don can either win Betty back and carry on much as before, or have the divorce, make the best of it (insofar as the kids are concerned), and get on with his career. Except for the tendency to stray from their marriage partners and a fierce desire to succeed at their chosen professions, there is little in common between Don and Tiger. Don's life is still pretty much a private thing while Tiger's is considered "News."

"If you don't like what's being said, change the coversation"

Q: What's the difference between a car and a golf ball?

A: Tiger Woods can drive a ball 400 yds.

Q: What do an arctic seal pup and Tiger Woods have in common?

A: They've both been beaten by a Swede with a club.

Thank you - I'll be here all week...

If I'd been Elin, I'd have used a cast iron skillet....but, that's just me.....

oh, and I wouldn't have used it on his noggin....let's just say he'd have had an urgent trip to the ER....and he wouldn't have been able to sit down all the way there.....

change your name

Don to Tiger:
Say what she wants you to say so you can get back to work. Then move forward.

And, by the way, only have one mistress at a time and keep her for months. That way you limit your exposure.

Top 10 Things Don Draper Would Say to Tiger Woods:

10. Blame it on another ½ Black, ½ Asian professional golfer.

9. “Just Do It” is an advertising slogan created by guys like me for guys like you.

8. If you find hog fat in the fridge, run like Hell.

7. Hide your driver.

6. No fund raisers for Rockefeller at your home.

5. Go visit her parent’s home, knock her up, then she has to take you back. Wait, that didn’t work.

4. What is TMZ?

3. Does your wife need the number of a good therapist?

2. Wanna swap “Black Books”?

And the number one thing Don Draper would say to Tiger Woods . . .

1. Your career . . . . its toasted!

Polar, I've said it before and I'll say it again.....

....when you're funny, you're funny.

Polar Bear that was a great Top 10 list.

"Enlist in the Army, volunteer to go to Afganistan, wait for an officer to come to an unfortunate and grusome demise, assume his identity and start all over again. Hey, look what it did for my career!"

Polar Bear is funny, indeed. And Grumpyoldguy
analyzed it perfectly.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all.

Slight revision -

2. "I'll trade you my black book for your Blackberry."

Merry Chanukahdad, Happy Winter Solstice, and Joyous Buddha's Enlightenment to all. And to all, a good night.

@abe, are you new?

If so, welcome to the Maddicts!

And.....so sorry about the dreadful unfortunateness you endured at the Ford Theater.....