Rachel is still married, last we heard.

Plus she made it exceedingly clear she wanted no part of Don when she realized he was running away from something and he would not tell her what it was (this was right after Pete tried to blackmail Don w/the box of photos and other items that Don's brother Adam sent him)

It was easier for Don to tell Rachel about his past: she doesn't know he's using an assumed identity.

There is plenty of blame to go around in Don and Betty's toxic marriage. I think each pretty equally contributed to the demise of the marriage. I think that's the way it is with most marriages in real life. It takes two to make it work and two to break it up.

Hear, Hear Manhattan Girl! As to imamarilyn's comments, I agree that Don's philandering aided and speeded the demise of the marriage, but I disagree that in this, or in most cases the blame is "equal;" like one of those fairy tales like the lies their marriage was built on. I often hear on one partner trying to fairly apportion blame, and that is a telltale sign that one is trying to dismiss their own guilt. I don't think the apportionment of guilt really matters, except one is trying to excuse and escape their own blame - rather than take responsibility for their actions. Saying, "you did something bad too!" is just a childish way to avoid accountability for ones own actions.

I do not know who is "more" at fault b/w Betty and Don; and I think that question is really irrelevant. The structure of society and social institutions, esp. marriage and success/the American Dream, prevalent at the time also contributed a great deal (in this fictional, but analogous reality) to their split. but the fact of the matter is that I would wager that Don is more prepared to accept the consequences of his misdeeds, and make amends and change; while it seems clear that Betty hasn't even acknowledged the brimstone bargains she has made (she didn't ask Don any questions about his background until after their marriage; his sleek facade, the mink, the great job, the house in Westchester, entree into the suburban elite, was all she cared about). Now, having fallen to earth from her love fantasy, she accepts no responsibility other than her own happiness (what will become of those children? - didn't her vows require her to do more than cast judgment on Don b/c he earned rather than was born into their social caste?); wishing to trade in her former fantasy for a new one (just as shallow and well researched). She has a rude awakening coming to her down the line.

I don't think Betty left Don because of his humble beginnings. In fact, there was a scene in an earlier season where she said that she assumed the reason Don never talked about his childhood is because he was poor.

And when Don finally came clean and told her the truth about his past she was visibly moved and full of empathy. I think that Betty in general is an empathetic character struggling to make sense of her world and the conventions she has followed so strongly. When the divorcee showed up in her neighborhood she was alone among the women in wanting to look past the stigma of divorce and accept her as a person.

I see Betty as a late bloomer. It sounds like she married Don for love, and not for status. Don was a coat-check man during their courtship (according to Roger). But she has still lived her life very much in the grip of social convention and tried to be the "perfect" wife for Don, again, out of love for him.

It took repeated humiliation from him to finally spur her on to start seeking out her own independence, which has been taking place slowly during seasons 2 and 3.

I don't understand, watching the show, how anybody could possibly place any significant blame on Betty for the failure of their marriage. She basically forgave Don and tried to look past his infidelity (which he was never even man enough to explicitly admit to). She tried to make it work. He went right back to cheating on her.

The greatest impasse in their relationship, IMO, is that Don refuses to treat her as an equal. He is too attached to an old version of their dynamic, in which Betty is the child who needs his strong guidance. Sure, Henry is a crutch, which she is using to take the action she is not strong enough to take on her own - leaving Don.

And Henry Francis is not really a choice for upward mobility. Status- and money-wise, he and Don are equals.

No, no, no ... Betty didn't leave Don because she felt repulsed by his prostitute-mother background, as Don feared. That was the FINAL straw in a HUGE list of betrayals -- and a big one, too, since she fundamentally doesn't know who she wass married once she found out about his stolen identity. P.S. Being cold and/or a snob doesn't mean you deserve to be cheated on by your spouse repeatedly, in my book. And the way I see it, Betty is a "princess" as her father Eugene blurted out loud, a 50s/60s ideal, one who fulfilled her end of the 50s/60s marriage model ... so she had every right to want someone "good enough" for her. I adore Don from the bottom of my heart but he screwed up this one in my book.

@GenXJackieK....I agree that Don treated Betty badly, but I don't like how Betty thinks everyone is beneath her. She's a stuckup snob. You stated that she left Don because she fundamentally doesn't know who she was married to. I don't get it because she left a man that she was married to and built a family with for years for a man who truly is a complete stranger. It doesn't seem rational to me. They both cheated and disrespected thier vows. It doesn't matter who cheated first or who cheated more. Frankly, I think Don and Rachel should be together. Can you imagine how Betty will react the first time she sees Don with a new woman in his life. I'm waiting to see that episode.

How will Betty react to the new woman in Don's life? The way she already has reacted ... every time she found out Don was cheating! And it was such a sad reaction to see, as a viewer. All that pent up hurt and the confusion at never being enough for Don, who wants to have his cake and eat it, too, with a submissive wife at home and all the women in New York City who will have him ...

I think that Betty left him because of the complete totality of his betrayals. Night after night of not knowing whether he would spend the night at home with his family. Picking up on the subtle signs of adultery, he used Conrad Hilton a couple of times as a foil for his running around with Sally's teacher. but the last straw was all the lies about who he actually was. I don't blame her one bit! I love Don but I understand Betty. You wonder how many of his friends knew, and you think about the time you sat there listening to Francine talk about her unfaithful husband and the whole time you look like the biggest fool in Ossining. The way he told her she looked "desperate" in that beautiful yellow bikini and didn't want other people looking at her.

Right on, judahjsn Betty told Don she had knew he had been a farmer and he hated his father. She did not mention any time that having humble beginnings was a reason to leave Don. She said, clearly, in the revelations from the box, “I can’t trust you.” Don never did address this. She also said, “You lied to me every day.” Don did his avoidance thing by proposing three ridiculous times a man might tell his wife or girlfriend he’s not who he says he is. A good time would have been in 1:2. When she finds this out, all those suspicions, the litany she gave the shrink, for instance, as well as her cries during delivery of Gene, became probable instead of just possible. Pile that on top of his despicable conduct in keeping her ignorant of his work life and the family finances and you have nothing left to base a marriage on. Had this happened in year one, there would never have been a year two, because nobody cares what Don does if there’s no one at home to cheat.

Also, Betty is no snob. She’s the one who would talk to Helen Bishop. She never indicated by word or deed that she was above anybody. She did have bad things to say to people who tried to tell her there was something wrong with Don. She told Jimmy the comedian that “You people are ugly and crude.”

I’m not saying much about Don here, because he can’t help a lot of what he does.

Is it just me, or does anyone see a similarity between Betty's character, especially in the first season, and Dina Merrill in Butterfield 8? (1960 with Elizabeth Taylor). I just think there must have been some influence, based on the bedroon shots.

I've been watching this show since the beginning and have just come onto the message board today, and I'm amazed at how much people dislike the Betty character. I always thought she was the most complex character on the show, after Don, and loved watching her character evolve. I'm sure I was not alone in rooting for the one night stand, the affair, and the divorce.

Don is a much more f'ed up character in many ways. The balance is created by the fact that despite his infidelity he shows emotion for, and cares deeply about the children. In this way, he doesn't seem like a villain.

The complexity of Betty and what she represents (the shift in women's roles in the 1960's, the move toward liberation and equality) are important aspects of the show. Her being cold and perhaps snobbish are cues about her social upbringing and are contrasted with Don's lower class background. Betty behaves as a rich, well educated girl in the 1950's ought to. The fun is in watching her discover the frustration and emptiness of fitting the hopelessly impossible and dissatisfying mold.

When she comes back from Rome and says "I hate this place," it is the last phase of the journey. She admits that all she was sold (which incidentally happens to coincide with the housewife lifestyle that advertisements sold in the 1960's) was not as satisfying as it looked from the outside.

In a way, Betty is everywoman. Her transformation accompanying the discoveries she makes in the last season, about herself, the world, and her marriage, is fascinating to watch because it is realistic.

Everything she has known to be real and secure suddenly turns out to be a lie. The president is shot to death, the world is upside down, and she's trapped in it. That episode really drives home the absurdity of it all.

It is important and refreshing to see her complexity alongside Don's. In a way she is the foil to Peggy, the ambitious career woman, who gives up her baby and puts climbing the corporate ladder above all else. Betty is the 1950's ideal housewife who drops her whole life for her family. Meanwhile, Ms Farrel (albeit a bit discredited by the questionable morality of the affair) is a vision of a more balanced woman who is at peace with herself and the world around, an allusion to a future after the 1960's.

Anyway, there is no real reason to vehemently dislike the Betty character (or January Jones) apart from our own biases. The thing is, she makes viewers uncomfortable, because there she is a woman full of inner turmoil, frustration, helplessness, anger and insecurity, who slowly begins to discover that it doesn't need to be that way.

In conclusion, I, for one, like Betty.