Horror Power Ranking - March 23, 2009
A Korean horror powerhouse takes the top slot, and there isn't a damp, dark-haired ghost girl in sight. Sam Raimi's latest continues to make a strong showing. And fans, including AMC bloggers, say Last House on the Left is far better than professional movie critics make out. Now let's get to the ranking.
Think our rankings are off base, out of touch or hopelessly lame? Speak up here!
| Horror Power Rankings | ||||
| Rank | LW | Movie | ||
| 1 | - |  |
Thirst Here's what I know about Thirst: It's from Oldboy director Park Chan-wook, Kang-ho Song (The Host) stars as the lead priest /vampire, and it just might be the best horror movie of 2009. |
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| 2 | 1 |  |
Drag Me to Hell ...Though if there's a strong contender for that title, it's last week's number one, Drag Me to Hell. Word out of SXSW is that Sam Raimi is back in fine form, perfectly mixing over-the-top humor, gore and horror. I can't wait. |
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| 3 | 2 |  |
Last House on the Left And if there were a third contender for the title... OK, it probably wouldn't be Last House on the Left. But the remake of Wes Craven's 1972 movie doesn't deserve the critical drubbing it received. Other bloggers agree! |
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| 4 | - |  |
The Roommate And now a quiz. I'm sticking this movie in the number four slot because: A) Crazy roommates are scary; B) I had to put something here; C) Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester may be in it, and I'm a huge fan. Guesses? |
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| 5 | - |  |
Slaughter's Road Werewolves are the new vampires are the new zombies, so it's no surprise that TV's John Connor (Thomas Dekker) will tackle the hairy horrors in Watchmen scripter David Hayter's next flick. |
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| 6 | 3 |  |
It Reader Gil Mann points out that many questions surround the killer clown movie, enough to knock it down three slots from last week. Who's directing? Who's in it? And will the book's creepy sex scene make it to the screen? |
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| 7 | 8 |  |
The Haunting in Connecticut Why is Haunting moving up one slot? Because every day I see posters and ads for the film, and it just seems to be trying so hard and so earnestly to be good, I can't stay mad at it for that stupid, stupid title. |
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| 8 | - |  |
Re-Animator The bad news: Producer Brian Yuzna is talking about a remake of Re-Animator, one of the few untouched horror classics, and Jeffrey Combs won't star. The good news: A reboot might be better than the sequels. |
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| 9 | 7 |  |
Nightmare on Elm Street Freddy's been bouncing around the list for weeks, and I'm torn between thinking a remake could be cool and thinking it's, well, nightmarish. This week, I'm pretty down on the idea. |
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| 10 | 9 |  |
Final Destination: Death Trip 3D As with Nightmare, I want the latest Final Destination to be good. My gut says it won't be, because the series has been, um, a series of diminishing returns. They might as well call this one Final Destination: Cash Grab 3D. |
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A casual reader might infer from the post above that my comments have something of substance to offer. Please correct.
Also, I'm calling BS on the LHotL anti-backlash backlash. Oh, I'm sure it's watchable, but
SPOILER ALERT, I GUESS
They don't kill the girl. So now, it's not about revenge, it's about "how far would you go to protect your cubs, Mr. and Mrs. Bear?" For all its flaws---and very little about it can't be filed under "flaw"---the original had a hardcore, unflinching premise that this one lacks. Or, more to the point, jettisons.
That doesn't make it bad, of course, it just gives it a (disappearingly small, granted) chance against the Keifer Sutherland version of The Vanishing in the "missing the point" sweepstakes.
All that said, the only way Garret Dillahunt could be more awesome is if he really was a cyborg, so we could be talking about "Last House: the Musical" and I'd still be kinda psyched to see it.
@Gil Mann: Ha! Won't make the mistake in the future.
And for Last House, I understand it's not as hardcore as the original, but different times call for different approaches, and I think this one works for now... Though I understand people may disagree.